Meh, i'm back... So many things have changed, yet more have remained the same.
In camp now, shld really be asleep.
What's this blog for anyway? Or more accurately, who is it for?
Probably gonna get married next year, feelings shift from happiness/contentment to ambivalence.
Not a good combination, i assure you dear reader.
Spending time with wonderful women worries me that i might be missing out on some wonderful life experiences.
And this isn't lust talking...there are just some...things that azur can't fulfil, as well as things that i know that i dont fulfil for her.
L is still ard, and we keep in touch. Gorgeous as ever, i swear my heart skips a beat when she stands close to me.
We went out to look for syik's bday gift, got some naughty chocs for her :)
L wore a simple mango t-shirt and my tongue got stuck in my throat. How stupid is that?
Plus there's nutz, who is really great company. Intellectual, knowledgeable and warm. And she's definitely easy on the eye :)
A lanky sort, never been attracted to one before. If i were single, i'd definitely ask her out.
And no, there havent been any indiscretions, not the ones with L anyway :p
Ah crap, i'll update tmrw
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Comp
Comp is coming, and i'm playing again...Woohoo!! And it's my bday today!!! Double Woohoo!!!
Wish me luck :)
Wish me luck :)
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Back!!!!
Damn it's been long!!!! Hello world!!!
So many things have changed, and yet so many have remained the same...
Updates...
I've graduated woohoo, 2nd lower!!! At a shipyard in Benoi now. Work's good, interesting but bloody hot, and there's a lack of female company *bleargh*
There's yessic though...she's really sweet. If i were single, i'd ask her out :p plus, i think she's fond of me heheh. It might all be just in my head though... Not the first time that's happened hahaha
And i'm getting engaged in Oct/Nov!!! Hasnt really sunk in yet though... Still seems a bit surreal. Esp since i tried to break up with azur THREE times :( i'm a crappy boyfriend, i know. We still haven't resolved the whole L thingy, and it's totally my fault.
I cant get her outta my head, and we've been smsing quite a bit nowadays...plus she seems more affectionate. Damn damn damn.
I love azur, i really do, but something she said really stuck with me. "What if the one you love is not the one who can REALLY make you happy?" What next?
Questions questions... Maybe i'll update another day, ciao :)
So many things have changed, and yet so many have remained the same...
Updates...
I've graduated woohoo, 2nd lower!!! At a shipyard in Benoi now. Work's good, interesting but bloody hot, and there's a lack of female company *bleargh*
There's yessic though...she's really sweet. If i were single, i'd ask her out :p plus, i think she's fond of me heheh. It might all be just in my head though... Not the first time that's happened hahaha
And i'm getting engaged in Oct/Nov!!! Hasnt really sunk in yet though... Still seems a bit surreal. Esp since i tried to break up with azur THREE times :( i'm a crappy boyfriend, i know. We still haven't resolved the whole L thingy, and it's totally my fault.
I cant get her outta my head, and we've been smsing quite a bit nowadays...plus she seems more affectionate. Damn damn damn.
I love azur, i really do, but something she said really stuck with me. "What if the one you love is not the one who can REALLY make you happy?" What next?
Questions questions... Maybe i'll update another day, ciao :)
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Hiatus Over
I'm back from my hiatus!!! Never knew there was one though... Anyway things are looking pretty good on the romantic front. Everything's progressing along nicely, except for the overcoming temptation bit, heheh
Updates when i feel like it
Updates when i feel like it
Monday, July 30, 2007
Old and New
L said yes to Haf Jap, so i guess it's official now. I have to admit, a small part of me was sad and my heart skipped a beat, but there was really no other way. They seem really happy together, and i hav azur with me...Is she more than i deserve?
We'll be celebrating her birthday later, i hope everything goes well. Lunch at delifranc, movie at vivcity (51 Bucks!!) and dinner at swens. I got her a necklace and earrings, with L's help :)
I guess my biggest fear is looking deep within myself and finding nothing but a well of dissatisfaction. The fear of being inadequate, of finding inadequacy in others. To be truly grateful, syukur, that is one of my greatest wishes. A fine line exists between the drive to succeed, and the desperation of never stopping. That wisdom is not mine yet.
Can it ever be?
We'll be celebrating her birthday later, i hope everything goes well. Lunch at delifranc, movie at vivcity (51 Bucks!!) and dinner at swens. I got her a necklace and earrings, with L's help :)
I guess my biggest fear is looking deep within myself and finding nothing but a well of dissatisfaction. The fear of being inadequate, of finding inadequacy in others. To be truly grateful, syukur, that is one of my greatest wishes. A fine line exists between the drive to succeed, and the desperation of never stopping. That wisdom is not mine yet.
Can it ever be?
Friday, July 27, 2007
Tropical Paradise
Well, i'm back from my holiday in Tiom, spent 3 fun days there, with 8 of my teammates.
Recording their names/acronyms or is that initialisms (?) for posterity : Shaz, S.F, Izza, W, L, Sye, Aidi and N Sup.
We went snorkelling, with me jabbering "fishies, fishies!!" like some idiot hahaha. The 2nd stop on the snorkelling trip was excellent. Water conditions were not optimal, but plenty of colourful creatures to see nonetheless. Especially the school of filefish, i think that's what they were called.
Before that was the trek to the freaking cold waterfall. Splashed around in the water like babies, shivering away... But not before we spent 45 minutes in a futile effort to find a better spot.
Higher, Colder!!! :p
Played games late at night, 'chop chili chop' and what-not. Sharing secrets with the rest, all in good fun.
Personally, the highlight for me was the time spent with L (who else)
On the bus and in bed, heheh. At least now i know, that she actually had me in consideration, and that it wasn't all in my head :p
Cuma lambat setapak dok... Anyway, we spent many close/intimate moments together. The massage late at night was nice, and sensual, for me anyway :)
How often do you get to give a massage to a pretty lady? And in that moment i could have kissed her, which i didnt. And the next night we slept in the same bed, which is certainly a new experience for me... Izza found us in bed the next morning hahaha
Well, i hope no-one else finds out about it, especially azur :p
But this trip has been really great, now that i can end the process of letting go of L, and really focusing on my relationship with azur. Plus i think L is gonna say yes to Haf Jap. Good for her. She made him wait 6 bloody months, my bad.
But but but why dwell on all that? It's azur's birthday today, and i hope she loves my gifts, hopefully, she loves me more than them heheh.
On another note, i finally applied for driving, with L hahaha. Watch out roads, here i come!
Recording their names/acronyms or is that initialisms (?) for posterity : Shaz, S.F, Izza, W, L, Sye, Aidi and N Sup.
We went snorkelling, with me jabbering "fishies, fishies!!" like some idiot hahaha. The 2nd stop on the snorkelling trip was excellent. Water conditions were not optimal, but plenty of colourful creatures to see nonetheless. Especially the school of filefish, i think that's what they were called.
Before that was the trek to the freaking cold waterfall. Splashed around in the water like babies, shivering away... But not before we spent 45 minutes in a futile effort to find a better spot.
Higher, Colder!!! :p
Played games late at night, 'chop chili chop' and what-not. Sharing secrets with the rest, all in good fun.
Personally, the highlight for me was the time spent with L (who else)
On the bus and in bed, heheh. At least now i know, that she actually had me in consideration, and that it wasn't all in my head :p
Cuma lambat setapak dok... Anyway, we spent many close/intimate moments together. The massage late at night was nice, and sensual, for me anyway :)
How often do you get to give a massage to a pretty lady? And in that moment i could have kissed her, which i didnt. And the next night we slept in the same bed, which is certainly a new experience for me... Izza found us in bed the next morning hahaha
Well, i hope no-one else finds out about it, especially azur :p
But this trip has been really great, now that i can end the process of letting go of L, and really focusing on my relationship with azur. Plus i think L is gonna say yes to Haf Jap. Good for her. She made him wait 6 bloody months, my bad.
But but but why dwell on all that? It's azur's birthday today, and i hope she loves my gifts, hopefully, she loves me more than them heheh.
On another note, i finally applied for driving, with L hahaha. Watch out roads, here i come!
Monday, July 16, 2007
Handover
It's done, im no longer the president, blessed relief :)
But H is damned pissed at me. Why, i have no idea. I didnt even give her the gift...which hurts me more than i care to admit :p
Anyway, spent the day at the island beach, damn fun. i expected more people to come, but beggars cant be choosers. Played many game, beat some guys at beach soccer, pretty damn good, i have to say...
Then berendam in the water with 4 ladies, how often do u get to do that? hahaha
Chatted about a lot of stuff, relationships etc. With L, Sya, Hali and N Sup. And L is definitely more affectionate nowadays, esp when we were grocery shopping the previous day. Even Hali and N Sup thought we had something going on :p
Oh well...
Had a street soccer tourney today at ghi mo. lost in the quarters, played only 2 games, cos 2 blardy teams in our group didnt turn up. And i scored 3 goals!!! (1 deflected in heh)
But we lost in the quarters, to a bunch of kids. But damn, they were freaking fast...
Watched a movie with azur, Zo and kami. The latest HP movie. Not bad, pretty dark, but i kinda preferred the previous one. Sent azur home, spent a few intimate moments... I gotta watch my expenditure, cash is running dangerously low again, and i still have 3 things to spend on. 2 holiday trips, and azurs bdae...
Meh
But H is damned pissed at me. Why, i have no idea. I didnt even give her the gift...which hurts me more than i care to admit :p
Anyway, spent the day at the island beach, damn fun. i expected more people to come, but beggars cant be choosers. Played many game, beat some guys at beach soccer, pretty damn good, i have to say...
Then berendam in the water with 4 ladies, how often do u get to do that? hahaha
Chatted about a lot of stuff, relationships etc. With L, Sya, Hali and N Sup. And L is definitely more affectionate nowadays, esp when we were grocery shopping the previous day. Even Hali and N Sup thought we had something going on :p
Oh well...
Had a street soccer tourney today at ghi mo. lost in the quarters, played only 2 games, cos 2 blardy teams in our group didnt turn up. And i scored 3 goals!!! (1 deflected in heh)
But we lost in the quarters, to a bunch of kids. But damn, they were freaking fast...
Watched a movie with azur, Zo and kami. The latest HP movie. Not bad, pretty dark, but i kinda preferred the previous one. Sent azur home, spent a few intimate moments... I gotta watch my expenditure, cash is running dangerously low again, and i still have 3 things to spend on. 2 holiday trips, and azurs bdae...
Meh
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